Winning and losing

Nigel Dawe

IT’S with more than a tinge of disappointment, frustrated dismay, and pure anger that I’ve wrangled this piece together. The cause of which has nothing whatsoever to do with our first three games. Yes, we have three bold L’s in our results column (the last two of which were certainly not great), but that’s life, and for the life of me I can’t understand the bozos – whether they don red and blue scarves or not – who rant their pea brain views and frustrations at players and coaches, like they could do, or have ever done, any better.

I’m glad I wasn’t at any of these games, only because I would’ve been far too disheartened by the antics of those within our ranks who just can’t take defeat on the chin, and simply move on in a dignified fashion.

I think I’ve made mention before, when our side is down, we need to adopt a ‘having sick relative’ mentality, that being the kind that shows support (which is ironically the key concept, not to mention driving verb behind the word – Supporter). The most appropriate response when a loved one has come down with something: is actually being there for them. If your child broke their arm this afternoon you wouldn’t go charging into the hospital to berate them for it, would you? Because people of substance don’t ever turn on one-another, they simply keep on turning up, and they hang in there – rain, hail or shine.

We’re better than this, much, much better than this! It broke my heart watching footage of a so-called Melbourne fan launch some kind of nasty-toned tirade at Max as he departed the field against North the other day, and the disappointed look on his face as he ever-so briefly snuck a peek at the clown who made it, will stick with me for a very long time. I just wanted to give our big seven-times All Australian a hug, and a good old-fashioned punch in the arm for luck.

Those of us who genuinely live and breathe this club have your back, it’s great to win, but that’s not why any of us should ever commit to causes like this; having tunnel visioned expectations that we will win – week-in, week-out (after having enjoyed such a purple period of success) is something that only fuels and enflames such vulgar responses to defeat. None other than Sir Winston Churchill once said, “Success is the ability to go from one failure to another with no loss of enthusiasm.” And while it comes across as mirth, it is actually meant in all seriousness: that being the most potent, unconquerable seriousness of all – the kind that is roused, and then truly rallied through the aid and force of enthusiasm.

Relatedly, I remember reading a comment by triple Brownlow medallist Bob Skilton, about his tenure at Melbourne as coach in the mid-70s, and how after having lost his first 8 games as coach (after the team had already lost the last 10 of the previous season) he was booed off the MCG, but club secretary Jim Cardwell bolstered his spirits by saying: “Bob, I don’t know if this will help, but I do remember them hooting Norm Smith off the ground one day too.” In the same interview, Skilton also made mention of what he best remembered about Smithy, and how our coach of the Century would ‘always preach’ – “Lose with dignity, win with respect for the opposition.”

It’s funny, I’ve often thought, none of us would ever dream of ‘correcting’ a brain surgeon on their performance or technique: “Say, you should have inserted your scalpel more to the left on your last incision, would’ve helped enormously – so just make sure that’s your approach next time!” Perhaps it has to do with surgical procedures being done behind closed doors, as ‘opposed’ to sport being performed in full view of an audience, I don’t know. But having faith and trust in those that are best placed to undertake what they are trained and hand-picked to do, is always a good place to start.